Failure of marriage marks a society's rot
A new survey out this week from the National Marriage Project shows that marriage is an institution in decline in many parts of American society. This "retreat from marriage in Middle America" will have wide-ranging social and economic consequences, say the survey's authors.
Another recent study of marriage, administered by the Pew Research Center, showed that nearly 40% of Americans believe marriage is becoming 'obsolete.'
What is marriage? Is it a civil union or is it a religious institution? How do you define it? Is there a marriage crisis in America today?
A marriage is a boisterous affair for Hindus--the party begins even before the ritual is complete. But even at the most chaotic of ceremonies, a hush prevails as the bride and groom stand, a vibrantly colored sash between them, to begin a conjoined journey into life with their first seven steps together--the saptapadi ritual.
With each step, the newlyweds voice hope for a wondrous sojourn in line with the goals of life: righteous and moral (dharma), health and wealth (artha), faithful love (kama) and spiritual fulfillment (moksha).
It is not a stretch to argue that it is in the sanctity of marriage and its advocacy for restraint, self-control, responsibility and commitment, that we find a clear area of interfaith unity. Marriage is the foundation of societal structure across cultures, and when 40% of Americans proclaim marital obsolescence, that foundation is wobbly indeed.
Contemporary society celebrates living together before marriage and friends with benefits; it laughs at abstinence as a bygone value; and seeks momentary pleasure without a thought for lasting contentment. Marriage then, does become an anachronism, and 40% of Americans are calling a spade a spade.
Few would argue that "moral values" are being redefined in society today, and marriage is following along with its own reappraisal. But leave aside their judgmental bombast, and one can understand why the "moral" minority is finding its voice over tea with partisan calls for imposing Christian values. When too many take the easy path to domesticity without stopping by to indulge that little ritual of marriage, the moral police may actually find broad support and encouragement.
But the rot that set sin after the marriage ceremony is also to blame. That too many of us are flouting the sanctity of marriage weakens its relevance. No-fault divorces does much to debase the institution of marriage is a society of instant gratification, seven-year itches and quickies, where over a quarter of married men admit to having an affair. It really is quite simple: what part of "till death do us part" and "through sickness and health" and "to have and to hold" do we fail to comprehend?
Debates over who should marry, and who can marry should not cloud the importance of marriage--religious or civil--for a society's health. I argued before that religious institutions retain the right to define marriage; democracy, however empowers every citizen access to the benefits of marriage. Civil unions forged with attestations of commitment must accrue every benefit that marriage affords--commitment is the keystone for marriage, not sexual preference.
Hindus have their seven steps, but they are of different colors, shapes and numbers for every faith. Let's encourage and empower the institution of marriage before couples fall down the slippery steps of false values.
By
Aseem Shukla
|
December 8, 2010; 11:56 AM ET
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Posted by: delivery-man | December 10, 2010 10:16 AM
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NTERESTING:
There was a Great American Legend about a humble person named "SHILOM" who wrote the supplement part of AMERIKA'S Eklah-tarian's B.O.T. a/k/a "Book Of Trans{Finity" and recorded a conversation between him and his his immaculate Step-Son who was born with Cleft-Lip.
So here it is Electronically. Remember, this is the legend, "SHiLOM" Amerika's prophet, bard.. of "Apocalyptarian-Faith" recording a holyi moment (1960):
"... About 9-months after me Boy/SON was born; he miraculously started to talk, Clearly & coherently, from his crib saying,
"DAD you are NOt-My-Father" & continuing, "Your Mother was Cosmically impregnated by my (4)'Four-FATHER(s)' [Moses, Vyasa, Jesus & Muhammad] from Heaven where each had sex with my [Human] Mother (your wife) while she was asleep ... and their Cosmic-Sperm & by the Cosmic-Dance, had immaculately coalesced themselves into 1-One representing ME ... But i Love you, as my Huumon Daddy in flesh, is that O.K. Dadda?"
SO, i asked the lad, "SON, can you prove to me that you are truly the SON of the Four-Great-Fathers, Prophets as being ONE(1) in You?"
He said, "Sure Daddy! ... You see Dad i was born & blessed with the Knowledge and the Power of all 4-BOOKS of my Father(s). i know the CHUMASH, i know the GiTA, i know the NEW-TESTAMENT & i know the QURAN + some.. includes knowing All the Languages on Earth & from other Worlds..."
So i asked the Wise 9-month old, "O.K. SON, Prove to your Dadda that you really Know All the Writings of your "4Four-FATHER(s)" So The Lad asked me to bring Him All-(4)Four-Holyi-Books.
So SHiLOM brought HE/Him (not a SHE/Her) All 4-Four Books (Chumash, Geeta, Bible & Koran & even the Kangyurs). So he told me, "Daddy-o please Start with the 1st-page of the Chumash and Follow my words as i recite them verbatim, O.K. Dadda?" i said, "O.K. Boy." So
The Lad started to recite, word-for-word, Pasik by Pasik, Stanza by Stanza, Sura, by Sura.. Here alittle & there alittle & Even recited all the Buddhist Books. i was shocked, and so i knelt down calling him "THE-SON-OF-OUR-Four-FATHERS" via 1-One////Mother!
PS: This is a genuine "EKLAH"t-ion Story, never heard on Earth Before by anyone and which is part of our Scripture recorded so faithfully in our O.U.R. book (O.ne U.niversal R.eligion) a/k/a "ULTRAPARATESTAMENT" of the "NEW-Song" (Conceived from All OUR OLD of course).
Reality: On S.pace-S.hip Earth There is NO such religion, by any Name, that is a "MONO-THEO" (1-god) System. That feat, is impossible to attain or even claim by any Human!
One must accept this TRUTH (opposite MYTH) to realize that All, Every & Any ABRAHAMIC' Flavors of their god(s) worship POLY-THEO Systems Only, Zero Mono! Same like HINDU & somewhat like in Buddhism All are Poly-Theo.
It is Humanly & godly impossible to have a "Mono-Theo Religion in this Reality Anywhere in the Universe! Pleas Do Not be in denial to selves nor loved ones.
YOU Worship what YE/YO Know NOt! O' POLY-THEiSTS, O' Atheist haters! O'.
Posted by: delivery-man | December 9, 2010 11:32 PM
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Sir.
Stop trying to Push your Eastern Religion on US. This is a HINDUTVA trick of the religious-trade. "Moksha," "Dharma," "Atha," "Kama" lalala. It's Not AMERIK. Better push Hinduism on the British Chaps instead aye.
HINDU, like so many other gods and competing systems is an Imported-Religion, especially When it comes to the United States. The true-Religion of United States cannot be expressed, except through what Uncle-Sam & Aunt Liberty reaps or deeds For itself and its Earthly Neighbors. Yet they are only being nice to your faith, for the sake of Peace, even when one (True-American) must feign 'Tolerance' of All imported Religions here, like HINDU & its Derivatives.
Hindu, like Islam, like Buddhist, like Christian, like Jew, like Sikh, like Jain... Does not Belong in U.S. of America. None are Born, bred, let alone Prophesied, in and for this 'Holyi-Landa.'
Remember; Sweet Sweet U.S.A. is a "Washing Machine" (not Garbage Disposal, For All Imported Religions. Hint: Assimilate or else. Where
"TIME is the best Medicine!"
What is the Medical word for Urine? But America is more like a Liver! So Hindu is like Alcohol that must also pass (not a stone) through the Kidneys. Then there is such a thing as a "Religious-Hangover."
You see DOC?
Posted by: delivery-man | December 9, 2010 9:29 PM
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"Contemporary society celebrates living together before marriage and friends with benefits; it laughs at abstinence as a bygone value; and seeks momentary pleasure without a thought for lasting contentment."
My great-grandmother (who lived through the Great Depression, and was therefore an eminently practical lady) before she died was quite pleased to hear that I was living with my boyfriend before being married to him. We have had a lot of domestic violence in my family, and it comforted her to know that before I signed anything legal, I'd already know what being his wife would be like, and that I'd be safe with him. These are the values in my family. It's not about momentary pleasure /or/ fear of commitment. It's about needing to be sure and needing to be safe, and needing to never ever be trapped with a man who isn't what he seemed. Just a different perspective worth considering.
"I argued before that religious institutions retain the right to define marriage; democracy, however empowers every citizen access to the benefits of marriage. Civil unions forged with attestations of commitment must accrue every benefit that marriage affords--commitment is the keystone for marriage, not sexual preference."
Agreed 100%.
David6: "No-fault divorce is far better than "accidental" kerosene stove fires."
Preeeeecisely.
Posted by: Cobalt_Blue | December 9, 2010 9:26 PM
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Opppsa. That post was meant for Anthony Arroyo & Eboo Patel respectfully.
ANYWAY: Believe or Perish?
Posted by: wikileaks2 | December 9, 2010 2:49 PM
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Jobandon, I assume that you are being sarcastic when you say that wives are responsible for their husbands' health.
In case you're not:
My husband is a grown man, capable of making his own decisions regarding the care and feeding of his body. He has liver disease, and because of that, is not supposed to drink alcohol and limit his intake of fatty foods. If he decides to ignore his doctor's advice, it is not my job to knock the bacon double cheeseburger, fries, and bottle of beer out of his hands and insist that he have a skinless broiled chicken breast, raw baby carrots, and a tall glass of wheat grass juice instead.
Posted by: lepidopteryx | December 9, 2010 8:36 AM
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They "cannot imagine". That part of the brain quit working, so they qualified for government work and high UN positions.
Posted by: jobandon | December 9, 2010 7:27 AM
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Whether wives like it or not, they are responsible for their husbands health. My Life is in Your Hands could easily be any married mans theme song. Now your life is going to be in government hands instead of hers. Then the government can dwindle into a state of decay approaching annihilation. We know ladies, she's more competent. We get it.
Posted by: jobandon | December 9, 2010 7:23 AM
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No-fault divorce is far better than "accidental" kerosene stove fires.
Posted by: david6
__________________________
David, I cannot imagine anyone disagreeing with you on that.
I suggest you bring this issue up at the next UN General Assembly Meeting. It is brilliant.
Posted by: FarnazMansouri2 | December 8, 2010 3:13 PM
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I can guarantee you that even if no-fault divorce were not an option, and the law said I had to stay married to him, I would not live under the same roof with my ex.
Posted by: lepidopteryx | December 8, 2010 2:53 PM
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I agree.
Mark
Always seek the truth.
Posted by: volkmare | December 8, 2010 2:40 PM
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No-fault divorce is far better than "accidental" kerosene stove fires.
Posted by: david6 | December 8, 2010 1:53 PM
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2-Corrections:
(1) "..Your MATE [Not Mother] was Cosmically impregnated by my "4FORE-FATHERS" [Moses, Vyasa, Jesus & Muhammad] from Heaven where each had Cosmic-Sex with my Mother while she was deeply asleep & their Cosmic-Sperm via Cosmic-Dance had miraculously coalesced themselves into 1-One, representing ME.."
Note: According to the Legend [story] that the 'Lado' ("SON of the Fore-Fathers" or "SON of the Four-Fathers") had been likewise blessed with a sibling ("DAUGHTER of the Four-Fathers" aka DAUGHTER of the Fore Fathers") a 'Lada' (Sister) only 13 days later after the 1st revealation of the 'dispensation' from the Crib (not Manger)story.
(2)
The First-Revealation of the "SON of the 4-Fore-Fathers" took place in December of 1958 (not 1960). & the Second-Revealation of the "DAUGHTER of the 4-Fore-Fathers" took place on January 1st 1959. 10 Years before the Great "Summer of Love" in WOODSTOCK, N.Y., took place.
Secret (opposite Revelation):
These 2-Two siblings ('DAUGHTER of our 'Fore-Fathers who was also born with Clef-Lip and 'SON of the Fore-Fathers') are direct offspring of MOSES, VYASA, JESUS & MUHAMMAD being 1-One was instructed by "SHILOM" (their Step Father) and before 5 sworn witness's {3-Private-Sector Employees & 2-Public-Sector employees; all bonafide witnesses} to never tell anyone about their immaculate Holiness but live Normal-lives and concentrate on completing the "BIBLE-OF-THE-FUTURE" for ALL their Children on S.pace-S.hip EARTH, a/k/a S.S. GEOiD, S.S. GAIA, S.S. TELLUSng something & by many names.
iMPORTANT: These two Children had been arranged by "SHILOM" after the "4-Four-Fathers" revisited his Wife/Spouse in a real Dream instructed them to Match-Them-up with 2-two other "DAUGHTER & SON of the 4-Fore-Fathers" by a 2nd mother who were born exactly the Same-Way but in [U.S.S.R.] RUSSIA, 1-minute apart (yet born with NO Cleft Lips). AND
Today (all 4: 2-Daughters & 2-Sons of our 4-Four-Fathers) They're happily married with highly advanced Kinda and live to be 100+ years old. BUT
IT is these Children (kids of the 4-Fore-Fathers); Who Will UNITE the WORLD as 1-ONE; in exactly 144 Years minus 51 = 93 Years from Today Circa '3007.
"United-Continents of-EARTH" due diligent +/- 3007 for the great "HEALING OF NATIONS in Everlasting 'WORLD-PEACE' & for more 'Good Tiding's as promised-US-all via OUR 4-Four-Fathers & their [Corrected] Prophecys being Newly Translated [Corrected] for HUUMATE-MEME's, a/k/a APOCALYPTIC-ON's, not HUUMAN (PRE-Apocalyptic-OFFs) sake anymore.
Note: Like Todays 'WikiLeaks' phenomena/On (slowly Releasing-Documents) That i[WE] the "EKLAH's-Disciples"s living on S.S. Earth STARTn Calendate 2011+' will Slowly & Surely DISPENSE most of 'SHiLOM's (B.O.T.+) WRITINGS!