Americans afraid marriage is changing

Let's not hyper ventilate about this marriage thing. There may be a few changes in how marriages will function. As long as the human beings yearn companion ship and intimacy the, meme of marriage will continue. May be there will be a significant many who may not get tethered, but then this is a new phenomenon. The repercussions of being single may be felt in full import in the late stages of life. Which means in another 30 or so years the youth of that time (most of whom aren't born yet) may realize the folly of trying to go it alone and marriage may come back in vogue. I don't like to be an alarmist in these matters. What I certainly hope and long is our fellow humans who are of non-heterosexual persuasion not be stigmatized and countries all over the world legalize their marriages too, very soon.

As Shaw said, changeable women are more endurable. They are sometimes murdered, but seldom deserted. The only one who likes changed is a wet baby. I think that was a Mark Twain sermon.

Marriage has NEVER been an ideal, perfect, thriving-throughout-society institution.

Take the "moral", "family-values" Victorian era. How healthy was marriage then?

The vast lower class didn't marry, generally. They just shacked up, mostly. (There's a reason Alfred Doolittle in _Pygmalion_ doesn't marry his live-in lover until he gets rich, and then has to.) And women and children could be beaten with impunity, by lovers or husbands, even to death - and were admired for fidelity towards their abusers rather than courage in leaving (look at that sentimental moralist Dickens' attitude towards Nancy in Oliver Twist - she's not married to Bill, btw, just beaten to death by him because she refuses to leave).

The upper class married for money or status, and then after producing sufficient heirs, ignored their marriages ever after.

The middle class honored marriage in the ideal, but not necessarily the practice (look at what that sentimental idealist Dickens did to his wife, after all, when he fell in love with Ellen Terry). But there weren't many of them. And even in the middle class, marriage didn't last any longer than it tends to do for us - it was just more likely to end in death than divorce. At least with divorce, both parents are still alive to love and take care of their kids...

In marriage, women were their husband's property, with no legal existence of their own. They could be beaten or raped with near-impunity. Any money they earned was their husband's, to be used at his will - even if he'd deserted her, he could come back and take whatever pittance she'd earned to care for their children and drink it away in the nearest tavern if it suited him.

Illegitimacy was common, as were orphans. Unwanted babies and kids could be dumped in horrid unregulated boarding schools, or left at poorhouses or workhouses or orphanages to be underfed, underclothed, and overworked. Most died. Even wealthier, loving parents dosed their babies with opium to keep them quiet, and/or left them with caretakers almost constantly.

"Designed as a gift to bring glory to the Creator, marriage is an institution critical to the sustainability and stability of society"

What kind of Parent gives their children gifts not to care for their happiness, but to increase their own glory? Does your God do nothing that isn't meant to inflate his terrible ego?

Thank you. At long last a sane man among a plethora of nincompoops who were depressing the hell out of me. lol.

Being married was the best thing that ever happened to a guy like me, and while she was with us it was a Godsend, and I say that even though I am not religious and very secular (religion neutral) in my views, and she was a good church going girl, but that never got in the way of happiness. lol.

Anyway, once you've tasted the sugar of happiness you still remember it years later no matter how unlucky you've been you remember you were happy once. Only idiots deny themselves that happiness. lol.

"If there is no marriage, there is no hope of the happy ending"

Okay, should I or shouldn't I?

Marriage is not obsolete, it is ever so slowly evolving, being adapted to the changes in our society.

"It is heartbreaking to think of those who come home - or wait at home - without a similar sense of anticipation. "

Except, of course, in Daly's Jesuslandia, gay partners.

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